Perfectionism Rewired

• Tired of Feeling Overwhelmed? Start Here

  Feeling overwhelmed? Stressed out? Anxious? Being vague about your emotions is like saying you're "craving food" for dinner—utterly unhelpful! Your perfectionist brain needs precision to create the right action plan for you. Learn why labeling your emotions accurately is crucial for regulating your body's responses and the essential skillset all perfectionists need to understand their emotions, what the feelings mean and what to do about them, guided by the latest neuroscience research.On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or becoming JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewire TIMESTAMPS:01:08-Controlling of emotions03:13-How to stop feeling overwhelmed05:28-Muffin-Cupcake Experiment07:54-Why Words Hold Physiological Power09:48-Emotional Regulation skills12:14-What the skill of emotional granularity buys you14:23-How to rewire your brain15:27-Becoming an Emotional Sommelier18:52-How do you construct your emotions more accurately? Resources Mentioned In Episode 248:Perfect Start Introductory Session Single Coaching SessionAvoiding Perfectionist Mistakes in Expressing Emotions Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 173Will Save Your Sanity(might change your life) Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 193Everything You Need to Know About Self Regulation as a Perfectionist  Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 194 Citations/Sources:Barrett, L. F. (2017). How emotions are made: The secret life of the brain. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.Barrett, L. F. (2016). The theory of constructed emotion: an active inference account of interoception and categorization. Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience, nsw154–nsw154. https://doi.org/10.1093/scan/nsw154Barrett, L. F., Gross, J., Christensen, T. C., & Benvenuto, M. (2001). Knowing what you're feeling and knowing what to do about it: Mapping the relation between emotion differentiation and emotion regulation. Cognition and Emotion, 15(6), 713–724. https://doi.org/10.1080/02699930143000239‌Crum, A. J., Corbin, W. R., Brownell, K. D., & Salovey, P. (2011). Mind over milkshakes: Mindsets, not just nutrients, determine ghrelin response. Health Psychology, 30(4), 424–429. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0023467Gendron, M., Lindquist, K. A., Barsalou, L., & Barrett, L. F. (2012). Emotion words shape emotion percepts. Emotion, 12(2), 314–325. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0026007Hoemann, K., Gendron, M., & Barrett, L. F. (2022). Assessing the Power of Words to Facilitate Emotion Category Learning. Affective Science, 3(1), 69–80. https://doi.org/10.1007/s42761-021-00084-4Hoemann, K., Khan, Z., Kamona, N., Dy, J., Barrett, L. F., & Quigley, K. S. (2021). Investigating the relationship between emotional granularity and cardiorespiratory physiological activity in daily life. Psychophysiology, 58(6). https://doi.org/10.1111/psyp.13818Hoemann, K., Lee, Y., Kuppens, P., Gendron, M., & Boyd, R. L. (2023). Emotional Granularity is Associated with Daily Experiential Diversity. Affective Science, 4(2), 291–306. https://doi.org/10.1007/s42761-023-00185-2Hoemann, K., Nielson, C., Yuen, A., Gurera, J. W., Quigley, K. S., & Barrett, L. F. (2021). Expertise in emotion: A scoping review and unifying framework for individual differences in the mental representation of emotional experience. Psychological Bulletin, 147(11), 1159–1183. https://doi.org/10.1037/bul0000327Satpute, A. B., Nook, E. C., Narayanan, S., Shu, J., Weber, J., & Ochsner, K. N. (2016). Emotions in "Black and White" or Shades of Gray? How We Think About Emotion Shapes Our Perception and Neural Representation of Emotion. Psychological science, 27(11), 1428–1442. https://doi.org/10.1177/0956797616661555Westlin, C., Theriault, J. E., Yuta Katsumi, Nieto-Castanon, A., Kucyi, A., Ruf, S. F., … Barrett, L. F. (2023). Improving the study of brain-behavior relationships by revisiting basic assumptions. Trends in Cognitive Sciences, 27(3), 246–257. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tics.2022.12.015‌‌ Perfectionism Rewired is committed to neuroscience truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, neuroplasticity + interoception techniques for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life you've worked so hard to create instead of obsolete advice to "overcome your perfectionism"

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• The Right Way To Compare Yourself

  It’s impossible to stop self-comparison as a perfectionist. You.Are.Going.To.Compare.Yourself and here’s the best way to do it! Discover 6 empowering ways to rewire unhealthy self-comparisons, perfectionism trash trades, how to tell if you’re fear-based striving, live coaching on 4 IRL examples of comparing, the only skillset you need for this to work 100% of the time  and a tool to instantly upgrade comparing yourself  On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or becoming JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewire TIMESTAMPS:01:26-Choosing Your Response to Comparisons03:07-The Skill Set of CAKE05:41-Trash Trades in Perfectionism06:55-Healthy vs. Unhealthy Comparisons08:47-How to Reframe Self-Critical Thoughts09:25-Breaking Free from Fear-Based Striving10:49-Living in the Present, Not the Future15:52-What Self-Comparisons Actually Reveal17:39-Tool to instantly upgrade comparing yourself21:48-How Tiny, Mighty Progress Fuels You Resources Mentioned In Episode 247:Perfect Start Introductory Session Single Coaching SessionComparing Yourself [PART ONE] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 245How Can I Stop Comparing Myself [PART TWO] Perfectionism Rewired Eo. 246Meeting Yourself Where You Are Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 187Will Save Your Sanity(might change your life) Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 193 Citations/Sources:Olson, J. M., Buhrmann, O., & Roese, N. J. (2000). Comparing Comparisons. Handbook of Social Comparison, 379–398. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-1-4615-4237-7_18Sirois, F.M., Monforton, J. and Simpson, M. (2010) "If Only I Had Done Better": Perfectionism and the Functionality of Counterfactual Thinking. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin , 36 (12). 1675 - 1692. ISSN 0146-1672 https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167210387614Stoeber, J., & Diedenhofen, B. (2017). Multidimensional perfectionism and counterfactual thinking: Some think upward, others downward. Personality and Individual Differences, 119, 118–121. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2017.07.009‌‌ Perfectionism Rewired is committed to neuroscience truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, neuroplasticity + interoception techniques for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life you've worked so hard to create instead of obsolete advice to "overcome your perfectionism"

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• Listening to the podcast + interested in learning more about services

  SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT. Press play.Perfectionism Rewired is committed to neuroscience truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, neuroplasticity + interoception techniques for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life you've worked so hard to create instead of obsolete advice to "overcome your perfectionism"

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• How Can I Stop Comparing Myself

  Tactical "stop it" approaches to self-comparison DO NOT WORK for perfectionists. Find out WHY along with the hidden costs of comparing yourself, why the approach you’ve taken to stopping self-comparison hasn't worked, what you actually need to do and scientifically what causes perfectionists to have an even harder time than non-perfectionistic people in rewiring this habit. On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or becoming JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewire TIMESTAMPS:00:00-Why self comparison tactics fail perfectionists01:41-The hidden costs of comparing yourself06:31-Recognize self comparison as a type of self punishment.10:11-Why intellect isn't enough to rewire perfectionist tendencies12:13-Developing skill sets over gathering knowledge15:00-Why it's scientifically harder for perfectionists to stop unhealthy self-comparison16:08-Acceptance vs. judgment in rewiring perfectionism18:00-What Silver vs. bronze medalists show us about comparing yourself to others21:30-Choosing growth over fear of failure Resources Mentioned In Episode 246:Perfect Start Introductory Session Single Coaching SessionComparing Yourself (pt.1) Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 245Discovering Your Hidden Motivators Perfectionism Rewired  Ep. 80Intrinsic Motivational Patterns Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 66 Citations/Sources:Curran, T., & Hill, A. P. (2019). Perfectionism is increasing over time: A meta-analysis of birth cohort differences from 1989 to 2016. Psychological Bulletin, 145(4), 410–429. https://doi.org/10.1037/bul0000138  Sirois, F.M., Monforton, J. and Simpson, M. (2010) "If Only I Had Done Better": Perfectionism and the Functionality of Counterfactual Thinking. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin , 36 (12). 1675 - 1692. ISSN 0146-1672 https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167210387614Stoeber, J., & Diedenhofen, B. (2017). Multidimensional perfectionism and counterfactual thinking: Some think upward, others downward. Personality and Individual Differences, 119, 118–121. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2017.07.009‌‌ Perfectionism Rewired is committed to neuroscience truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, neuroplasticity + interoception techniques for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life you've worked so hard to create instead of obsolete advice to "overcome your perfectionism"

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• Comparing Yourself

  Comparing yourself all the time? Tired of feeling like you never quite measure up...no matter how much you accomplish? It's not just YOU! Discover the sneaky specific ways self-comparison shows up for perfectionists, the difference between self-awareness + self-coaching, why self-comparison is not your fault but is your responsibility to change.  On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or becoming JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewireTIMESTAMPS:00:00-How you can stop comparing yourself to others02:32-The Annoying Problem with Surface-Level Self Comparison Tips03:46-Self Awareness vs. Self Coaching: What's the Difference?05:34-Dangers of DIY Approaches to Rewiring Perfectionism07:25-Why “How To Stop COmparing Yourself To Others” tips backfire for perfectionists12:10-Comparing Insides to Outsides Never Adds Up14:13-Moving the goalposts17:49-Punishment vs. Discipline: Changing Behaviors without Pain19:31-Understanding the Why Behind Your Perfectionistic TendenciesResources Mentioned In Episode 245:Perfect Start Introductory Session Single Coaching SessionBe Proud of Yourself Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 237Chasing Validation Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 236Proving Yourself At Work Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 232Citations/Sources:McCarthy, P. A., Meyer, T., Back, M. D., & Morina, N. (2023). How we compare: A new approach to assess aspects of the comparison process for appearance-based standards and their associations with individual differences in wellbeing and personality measures. PLOS ONE, 18(1), e0280072–e0280072. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0280072White, J. B., Langer, E. J., Yariv, L., & Welch, J. C. (2006). Frequent Social Comparisons and Destructive Emotions and Behaviors: The Dark Side of Social Comparisons. Journal of Adult Development, 13(1), 36–44. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10804-006-9005-0Zhou, Y., Yang, Y., Jiang, H., & Guo, C. (2025). Self-comparison versus social-comparison: The impact of imperfection on executive function in perfectionists. Personality and Individual Differences, 234, 112965. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2024.112965‌‌ Perfectionism Rewired is committed to neuroscience truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, neuroplasticity + interoception techniques for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life you've worked so hard to create instead of obsolete advice to "overcome your perfectionism"

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